As I sit here typing this, my swollen feet are soaking in a big galvanized bucket full of hot water and epsom salts. Bethel worship music pandora is flooding my candle lit home and my heart (and mind) are resting for the first time all day. My sweet husband and cuddly pups are by my side, I have on my favorite floral night gown, and we just finished a delicious home cooked meal.

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The truth is, I could share this and no one would know about the ugly. No one would know about the tears shed or the anxiety or the hurt. Neither Grayson nor I had a good day. Work is draining, unexpected bills come (ready or not), and worry creeps into the back of our minds no matter how many times we try and push it away. All I wanted to do on my way home today was stop and grab take out for dinner (again). Grayson, who had a painful dental procedure done today, just wanted to rest. But Jesus calls us to love each other the way He loves us. He gives us the strength to make the choice to show each other that tangible love when it’s not convenient or easy.

So, instead of turning right to pick up Japanese food, I turned left and ran into the grocery store on my way home. I came in, put on my favorite apron, and cooked a meal that was one of my grandma’s old go-to’s. Nothing worthy of sharing a fancy recipe, just a good, old fashioned week night supper. Afterwards, Grayson started heating water to fill this big bucket, poured in the epsom salts, and here I sit… amazed at how the Lord gives us the strength to serve one another. He’s so faithful to keep His promise of loving us with an everlasting love, and sometimes, the way He shows us that love is through other people. Tonight, I saw that sanctifying love in my husband.

Sometimes, in our brokenness is when we’re most able to be a true display of Jesus’ love. When we need a touch from Him the most, when we’re hungriest for His grace, when we long for that tenderness… sometimes that’s when we are able to portray the softest side of who He is. If we choose to let Him lead, instead of our feelings or emotions lead, we can both give and receive the sanctifying love that only He can provide.

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Stir in me a love that’s deep
A love that’s wide
A love that’s sweet
And help me Lord to never keep it to myself
And if my heart should dimly burn
And if my feet should fail to run
Call my name and I will come right back to You

There’s no fear in love

I want to stay close to You
It’s really that simple
I want to stay close to You
Just as simple as this song

I want to stay close to You
It’s really that simple
I want to stay close to You
My whole life long

Steffany Gretzinger, No Fear In Love